That Guy Who Gets All The Bad Poison Away is the best superhero movie since Logan. Finally we get to see a movie with both the gritty realism of Logan and the edgy, playful sense of humor of Deadpool. You heard it here first: TGWGATBPA is a fast-paced, absolutely crazy and action-packed thrill ride. I can’t recommend it highly enough to comic books fans and movie fans in general.
OK, I know what you’re thinking. You say it’s a great superhero movie, but what about the story? Trust me, this one’s got a story: Drick Bravisson (John Krasinski) is a mild-mannered computer systems analyst for the CIA until a Russian spy (Joe Pantoliano) throws toxic chemicals all over his face and body. It turns out the Russians mistook Drick Bravisson for a high-level political target, and now they’re gonna have to pay the price.
The chemicals transform Drick Bravisson into a crazy green monster kind of like the Hulk but with more wisecracks and less rage. At first Drick uses his powers to do crazy tricks like flip over cars and ride the skateboard really fast until it jumps over buildings. But then Drick realizes he has to use his powers to make the world a better place and that’s when he becomes That Guy Who Gets All The Bad Poison Away.
In the second act of TGWGATBPA, our hero uses his powers to stop the bad poison from killing innocent people. Bad poison is everywhere, but luckily because of his accident That Guy Who Gets The Bad Poison Away can be everywhere too. The editing and cinematography the filmmakers use to achieve this effect will blow your mind. Plus, Drick Bravisen has still got plenty of motormouth one-liners to add spice while he’s saving lives.
Eventually, That Guy Who Gets The Bad Poison Away realizes where all the bad poison is coming from: the Russians. That’s right, the same Russian military intelligence agents who sprayed Drick Barviton with toxic chemicals in the first place are discovered to be manufacturing all the bad poison that’s killing so many innocent people. I won’t reveal what happens next because no spolies but trust me when I say That Guy Who Gets The Bad Poison Away definitely gets all the bad poison away in the end.
Paramount has already announced plans for Dark Bavisson to return in TGWGATBPA 2 and 3 plus a tie-in series on Netflix. I personally can’t wait to see what happens next in this franchise that’s got more thrills and laughs than anything in the stupid Marvel Avengers movies which are just for dumb kiddies.
TL;DR – That Guy Who Gets All The Bad Poison Away subverts superhero film formula with wildly entertaining — and decidedly non-family-friendly — results.
What the rest of the critics are saving:
“I couldn’t believe how funny this movie was because superhero movies are usually just about the action.” – Mamat Trikabeon, Birth.Movies.Death
“Luckily for all of us in the audience, the chemical attack on Krasinski’s face and body transforms him into a much funnier and more interesting character.” – Nathan Rabin, The Dissolve
“That Guy Who Gets All The Bad Poison Away boasts some great stylish action, and is probably the funniest movie of the young year.” – Brad Keefe, Columbus Alive
“Joaquin Phoenix delivers a feat in his directorial debut (he also plays the villain Vladimir Rodchenko). On the superhero movie rating scale – which we can safely say has certainly had its ups and downs – TGWGATBPA is pretty juicy.” – Tombo Cruz, Collider
“Each time That Guy Who Gets All The Bad Poison Away turns into the camera and gives us some oddly phrased commentary on what’s just happened, it sent me into a huge giggle fit.” – Eric D. Snider, EricDSnider.com
“A dispiriting mishmash of elements from Deadpool and slightly rewritten lines from Beckett and Ionesco plays taken out of context and inserted into scenes of gratuitous violence and explosions.” – Nathaneal However, Guernica Magazine
“The sex scenes involving That Guy Who Gets All The Bad Poison Away and a visibly frightened Kristen Stewart made me so uncomfortable my brain just shut off for the rest of the movie.” – Alison Wilmore, BuzzFeed
“The Movie of the Decade!” – Owen Gleibermann, Entertainment Weekly
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